A week on, with the dust settling, the Duke of Cambridge back flying and the Duchess in the supermarket looking for something for dinner, here is a quick reference summary of the key points and moments for those who didn't have the time or inclination to settle in front of their tellys on 29th April for several hours of daytime viewing and couldn't manage the heap of souvenir colour supplements which came through their doors last weekend.
-You missed something.
-It was a great show and proved yet again that this is something that Britain does best. Royal weddings, funerals,occasions, parades. It makes no difference. We are the tops. American versions come across as pure pastiche/Disneyworld lookalikes. Goose stepping military shows so beloved of Peoples (un)Democratic Republics are nasty and threating,- often not least to that country's own population.Ever since Queen Victoria introduced most of the pageantry Britain has done it right. This event was superb.
-Scorned by many men as women's fayre, the blokes mainly watched it all the same.
-It was a mix of Old Windsor (Battenburg) and New Windsor (Windsor).
-Old Windsor didn't smile a lot. It's not their thing. New Windsor did.
-Old Windsor dressed for the races or the 1950s. New Windsor was very smart.
- Old Windsor had most likely blackballed Blair and Brown from the guest list. New Windsor,- more diplomatically would probably have said "What the hell, let them in".
-The bride's dress was ivory,had a train, and looked great.
-The Middleton family came across very well.
-General concensus that New Windsor could save the monarchy, especially in Australia, after its all time Charles and Diana low. Problem is though there's one more act by Old Windsor to come first. Do the decent thing Charles?
-Did Charles sing "God Save the Queen" with full enthusiasm?
-Did Camilla?
-Much betting went on about whether Prince Harry would score with the bride's sister-the chief bridesmaid.
-The lady concerned's bottom now has its own website. There was also a general internet concensus :"No knickers".
- All but a handful of the British attendees at the Abbey appeared to be Conservative and "No" voters in this week's elections.
- Should Prince William's helicopter sadly suffer a terminal malfunction, would King Harry make it an All-Party Britain? Could that be our best option?
-Two lesser Princesses, Beatrice and Eugenie turned up as a cross between panto dames and the ugly sisters. You'd have thought their father Prince Andrew would have given a tactful steer "You're not going out dressed like that", but that would have required good sense. Gave everyone a laugh though. Enough to frighten the horses.
-Maybe they did,-one threw its rider and bolted down the Mall. Its fate? Early retirement "arrangements" in France?
-While the Royal couple are received with great enthusiasm, some of the young and rather narrowly based coterie with whom they are almost inevitably surrounded aren't so attractive. Many of the hangers-on including the pot pourri of "in" celebs don't come across as such wonderful people.
-Becks didn't know which side to wear his medal earned for valour in the face of Alex Ferguson. Somebody must have gesticulated or more politely whispered in his ear in regal "Your flies are open" tone though as it was correctly on his left by the end of the service.
-There were said to be 5,000 street parties throughout the land (well, not all of it, none in Glasgow). In fact there must have been thousands more, each one a credit to those who ignored the legal niceties of registering, getting police approval, roads officially closed, health and safety assessments, insured etc etc. Some in Town Halls will be furious at this proletarian gesture of defiance.
-Maybe Glasgow would have had a party of it was State run and funded?
-The kiss x 2 gave the TV networks and crowds value for money as did the final act of the show,-the RAF flypast, first by the Battle of Britain flight followed by what is left of the strike force,- 2 Tornados and 2 Typhoons. A nice day off from Libya for them.
-At that, other than for those attending the evening party, the curtain came down. Literally a class act.
Next big Royal Event apart from minor outings of the bands and horses and barring any unforseable State funerals : Summer 2012. The Queen's 60th Jubilee of accession.(although it will be only 59 years since she was crowned on 2nd June 1953). Then will come the London Olympics. Will we be at work at all next summer?
